Well life has been good the past month. I’m enjoying my “peace within” immensely. I enjoy the job that I am doing and I do not mind the drive. However, this week was a killer with the snow. It took four hours to get into Toronto on Tuesday and two and a half on Wednesday. I made the sign of the cross that two and a half hours is my cut off point from now on.
There’s nothing more frustrating than sitting five feet past an exit on the 401 and dreading not taking it as you’ve been at a standstill for forty five minutes in that exact same spot.
It’s been good. I don’t know if it’ll be a lifelong career or just a passing ship in the game of life. We’ll see as I know production is not my thing.
About a week before I finished working at Reliance I discovered a lump in my breast. Suffice to say, I was anxiously awaiting my departure from hell, but called the doctor to be on the safe side. He took me in immediately and scheduled an ultrasound.
I knew there was something there as the radiologist took measurements and such. The next day I received a phone call while I was at work. Of course, I spent the night fretting over it because I had only retrieved the message after hours. Why are they calling back so quickly? Is it a tumour? What would life be like with only one breast? Shouldn’t I just remove both of them to be on the safe side? Would I continue working in Toronto? Would I lose my hair? Should I shave it when I get the news or wait?
All those thoughts we don’t want to admit that we have while we are trying our best to speak and think positive in front of everyone else.
I contacted my physician immediately the next day to find out that I do have a vascular cyst and to return for another ultrasound in four months. That was it. It was plain, simple and to the point. Of course, the beauty of the internet is that we can retrieve information (whether true or false) at the touch of a keystroke. Unfortunately, to this day, I have no idea what a vascular cyst is but I am assuming that it could turn into something or stay stagnant or disappear due to the four month lag in having another ultrasound.
So now my thoughts are “Phew, Thank God” to the public but deep inside I’m thinking “Are they right?, Is it more?, Did they miss something?, Did that Swedish Woman have a clue what she was doing?” However, I will put my faith in medicine and wait.
Of course, I have a spot on my liver as well. I guess it’s like a blood blister or something. So I immediately contacted my doctor and informed him that since the liver and breast is close together I will admit that I lost the requisition for my year liver ultrasound. I’m scheduled for an ultrasound on the 22nd of December. “Did they miss something? Could it be in the lung and only surfacing on the liver and the breast over the past few years?” Again, all those silly thoughts, but as we get older, we realize that we truly have to take our health into our own hands.
We must be our own God until he takes over.
Aside from that, I’m ecstatic to announce that I finally have a new kitchen floor. You do not understand. I have lived for six years with wall tiles on my floor. Each and every step we took was a chance in breaking yet another tile. My floor was a mosaic of grout and cracked tile. It was embarrassing to have anyone in my house. I hated washing the floor as it never truly looked “clean”. I figure since that is done, we’ll treat ourselves to a new countertop and backsplash as well. The backsplash will be my project that Toby will take over I’m sure.
I love working in renovation. I hate doing renovation. I hate gluing, hammering, ripping down and painting. Mostly, I hate cleaning after the fact!!
The past week has been nothing but stress because of the kitchen being in disarray. Yes, I’m going to Gaspe, but I would like to take the kitchen cupboards from my living room and assemble a tree. It just isn’t Christmas until the tree is up and a box of Quality Street Chocolates is shared while decorating.
We are going to Gaspe for the holidays. I’m quite excited now as it’s been three years since I’ve gone down. Christmas is a great time to see people and party. Nothing says Merry Christmas more than family and Christmas Cheer. Brandon and Toby are also excited…..Christina not as much as she has to miss her Christmas plans with friends.
Aside from the above issues, life is good…no great. I’m happy and at peace. Nothing is bothering me to the point of anxiety attacks and crying. To quote Bruce Almighty