It’s been ten long months since my life was completely flipped around from a bullying incident involving my daughter.
Life as we know it has drastically changed. Gone is the girl with spirit, giggles and a big toothy smile. Today there is a girl with a chip on her shoulder and hatred in her heart. I try so hard to bring her joy but it’s only a temporary fix.
She trusts no one. She has been bullied to the core.
She has always been a target but it took one incident, the proverbial last straw, to throw her over the edge.
I’m not going to go into the incident over again, however, it has left scars so deep that even counselling hasn’t resolved the issue. She changed schools, lost friends due to her inability to trust, and received no apology from the bully despite him being suspended.
I firmly believe that if the Waterloo School Board enforced an apology then maybe things would be different. However, when mothers step in, schools step back. Eventually, I took it to the school board about the incident but with a great idea on how to solve future incidents. I received a reprimand because I wrote to all of the school counselors. I was told that issues like these should only be directed to the superintendent who had a “boys will be boys attitude”. Nothing was duly noted about my idea.
I was trash to her.
Our house is no longer a harmonious one since my daughter has developed an incredibly loud whine and cajoles her brother too often. Of course, we do not tolerate this nonsense because life truly has to go on. She’s gained so much weight. My once model thin child has resorted to emotional eating as a solace.
She’s fighting a battle from within and there’s nobody but herself that can change it.
It kills me as a parent. This is her journey.
There are so many mother’s with young children online. The only thing I can advise is that you teach your kid’s the meaning of I’m sorry.
Teach your kid’s that compassion trumps malice.
Teach your children to remember that heart’s break easily, be gentle on everyone because you really don’t know whose heart is more sensitive than others.
Teach your children to confront people face to face (the old-fashion way) rather than online.
I hope that time will provide her the healing she needs. I hope that this rough edge that she has developed will subside over time. I will not tolerate her turning the tables no matter what.
Bullying is just not acceptable, even if you’ve been bullied.
This is a time of healing. No more blame is required. The incident has passed and it’s time to figure out how to change her perspective on people. It’s been a rough road, but I’m behind her every step of the way no matter how frustrating it is.
“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
Nothing is going to get better. It’s not.”
― Dr. Seuss, The Lorax