“It’s better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours!!!”

I have been itching to write all day long about my experiences, however, something was telling me “You’re not ready to share.” I’m not quite certain if even now I’m ready, but of course old habits never die quickly.

I attended the I Can Do It Toronto Conference, by Hay House US, this weekend. Let me tell you, it was an experience never to forget. I was physically able to sit through one seminar in its completion. Aside from that, illness struck me each and every time.

I arrived for my volunteer shift on Friday. Yes, I have the craziest feet and ankles known to mankind. Those that know me well, know that years of walking on my tippy toes have weakened the nerves in my ankles causing me great pain. The extra weight certainly doesn’t help. However, I’m a trooper. I brought runners, flats, high heels; mid rise heels…I was ready for many changes throughout the day.

My shift finished fifteen minutes after Wayne Dyer started speaking. Thanks to one of the volunteers, I was happily sitting three rows from Wayne Dyer. I must add that he is a wonderful looking man in his seventies. My feet started hurting and noticed that Wayne had his shoes off. I wondered if it would be presumptuous to do the same. I recanted. Then it started….first my feet, then my legs swelled up, then my breathing, then pains in my chest. I started panicking and wondered if I was having a heart attack. I decided to leave and upon arriving to my dive of a hotel, I called Toby and asked him to call me the next morning just to be sure I was still alive. Something was telling me that it wasn’t the heart, but the last place I wanted to die and sit fermenting was in a hotel room.

I woke up the next day, I felt great. I put on runners and walked to the Metro. Yes, I had pains in my feet and my legs as I expected. However, with a stretch here and stretch there, I manage quite well. I made a note and called Toby to voice my intention of calling the physiotherapist that I have been ignoring for six months. He forgot to call that morning, so I guess he wasn’t too worried.

I arrive at the conference, ready to roll with a change of shoes. The runners are flat, so I changed into the highest heels possible to give my tendons in the ankles a little lift. I was working that morning with Joan Borysenko. She’s a really intelligent Harvard graduate and her seminar was wonderful…or what I saw of it. Again, sore feet, swollen legs, breathing, chest pains. I went outside until I felt great and then returned only to experience the same. I left early that day and to my dismay I missed a really great seminar in the afternoon.

I took a shower and was ready to go again! A few volunteers convinced me to go out for sushi with them. The night was wonderful.

Next day, the same thing occurred. This was suddenly different. As I was sitting, I was looking around and felt like John Coffey on The Green Mile. I felt like I was sucking everyone’s negative energy into me and just dying to spit it back out. I came to the realization that our own personal energy certainly can transform another person. I often refer to those people as energy suckers in jest. I have always known that I have the weakness of allowing other’s to suck the positive energy out of me. However, 2,500 people sending their energy to me was overkill on my body. This venue was definitely not for me. I quickly realized that have to learn and understand this phenomenon that was happening to me at that very moment.

Sunday night, I returned home, ate, and dropped (literally) for over 10 hours. I woke up feeling a new beginning has arrived. How corny does that sound eh? I felt like I had been purified and a new beginning was around the bend.

I sent a few emails to those I had met during the show and Denise Linn responded that it was a BIG purification albeit extremely uncomfortable. Today, I felt alive and kinda poo poo my current job. I wanted to go in a direction of the unknown. I wanted to write….that’s all I know for certain.

A victory bigger than any battle won has surfaced from this weekend. I never listened comfortably to one speaker, it just happened.

Get rid of the bullshit….all it takes is a deep cleansing breath. Do not conform to the norm….because it’s all bullshit. No matter how rich, how beautiful, how powerful a person appears….that doesn’t matter because one day whether it’s during life or death, they can’t take it with them.

If they look at me strangely and think I am odd, they are not meant to be in my life and it’s time to move on to like minded thinkers. Hey there were 2,500+ in Toronto this weekend and I’m sure there are more.

The true meaning of life is experiences and transformations from those experiences. It’s all about the spirit of our soul.

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