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I think I’m a very adventurous human being after overcoming some severe heartache throughout my life.

I have lived through drug abuse, death of a brother because of it, alcoholism, a marital separation, bullying, child issues, family disconnect, poverty and the list goes on.  If I sat and moaned and groaned over it, I’d need Prozac.  All of these moments in life included heartbreak.

Sure, one can cower and blame their misfortunes on the past and other people, but the one truly important thing about heartbreak is that there is always a lesson.  Once you get past the anger, jealousy, or despair, the most hardest thing to do is to stand up, wipe the cobwebs off, and move ahead with a smile.  This is what gets me through any situation, but just realize that:

  1. Yes, it’s OK to be mad and voice your opinion.
  2. Yes, there is time to cry.
  3. Yes, there is a lesson to learn.  Where is it?
  4. No, I can’t find it, but it will come.
  5. Smile, take a huge breath and move forward.

Oddly enough, it took me many years to realize that the demise of my marriage, my neurotic 20’s and the angst of my children was due to my need to control.  After I learned the lesson, I allowed that part of my personality to disappear.  I quietly said goodbye to it and allowed life to happen.  With that, my house became a little messier, my lifestyle a little obscure, and it allowed me to live the life I truly wanted to live no matter what people thought of me.

I was trying to be in control of a life I hated.  Now, I still have the same surroundings, but because I allow myself and other’s to live around me freely, my life is pure and utter bliss.  Sure….there are day’s when I flip out because I’m one person cleaning a house with four adults.  I didn’t totally throw rational out the window.

I realize now that so many situations in my life, that caused me heartbreak, I could not control.  So why dwell or spew over it?

  • My child has learning disabilities – she will learn the basics in life….in fact, all that worry was for nothing because her spirit is thriving.  She is the most wonderful teen that I know.
  • My brother caused his own demise – sure, I was intimately involved because I lived with him, but the outcome was beyond my control.

There’s many more heartbreak’s in my life, but that’s constitutes writing a novel, not a blog post.

So if you can take anything with you after reading this, I would recommend just dealing with the heartbreak, set a timeline, and move forward.  Don’t look back, search for the lesson.

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